dear vainpot,

roughly 40 years from today we'd be watching the telly with our three dogs (and maybe even a pitbull) and we'd be holding hands. we'd laugh at when we were young and idealistic and got carried away and forgot. but we'd remember and laugh ourselves silly because we made it. because we made something that didn't extinguish or go away. 

that would never happen though, since you're adamant about dying before the clock strikes mid-life, before you acquire a beer belly and before my request for you to fund a face-lift. still my proposition stands: grow old with me. i'll buy you more straw hats and you'll be the sexiest senior citizen alive.